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They are more likely responding to a personal core fear that was triggered by the situation.
The most common pattern I observe is that of singles getting trapped in anxious or avoidant attachment patterns (click here to Discover if you act anxious, avoidant, or secure in relationships).The problem is that most people mistakenly believe that only spontaneous emotions are relevant.This causes them to scrutinize their and their partner’s emotions, taking them very personally.Is their struggle to connect and commit their fault, their partner’s, or both?What keeps them from creating lasting love and how can they break this pattern?
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When the underlying fear is exposed, it is easier for them and their partner to respond in a way that keeps them both Available, Responsive, and emotionally Engaged in their relationships (A. E.) as they learn to solve problems together as a couple.